Sharing a Home, a Career, a Church-This Day In Norwood History-June 15, 1991

Clergy Couple Find It Takes Teamwork at First Baptist Church

The Revs. Ronal K. Nicholas and Inga T. Freyer are not the first husband-wife team to serve a local church. But they can lay claim to one distinction: They were married and ordained in the church they now serve, the First Baptist Church of Norwood. And besides knowing the ups and downs of sharing both home and office, the couple say they can relate to parishioners in other ways, too. They have each weathered divorces and juggled the demands of careers and family. “We’re in contact with the average person in the pew,” Freyer said. “We know what it is to work 9 to 5.” And of their personal experiences, Freyer said: “I think whenever you’ve experienced pain, you’re open to the pain of other people. We probably see our mission here to be doing whatever we can to be a reconciling place 2 for people who are hurting and want to get well.”

Nicholas, 43, is the fulltime pastor at First Baptist and teaches liturgy at Andover Newton Theological School, a Protestant seminary. Freyer, 42, is the part-time associate pastor, and advises other churches on new programs. The two came from completely different backgrounds. Nicholas spent much of his youth with grandparents in West Virginia, and was raised in the Southern Baptist tradition. Freyer, born in New York City, said she grew up a devout Episcopalian in San Rafael, Calif., but fell away from the church during college. Later on, she said, she felt most comfortable at a Baptist church in Providence, R.I., where she sensed a feeling of community and belonging. Nicholas says of American Baptists: “There’s structure without being stuffy.”

Nicholas began serving at First Baptist before he was ordained. Freyer arrived in 1986, but the two had met at Andover Newton during the 1984-1985 term. They married in First Baptist in October 1986 and were ordained there in May 1988. Joanna Draugsvold, church moderator and president, credits the couple with revitalizing a church of mostly elderly churchgoers and which, like many Protestant churches, has been struggling to survive financially. “They’re always bringing new people in the door,” said Draugsvold, 38, a teacher at Noble and Greenough School. “I see the possibility of this church flourishing.”

How does a couple succeed in living and working together? “Not competing, that’s the key,” Nicholas said. Freyer said, “There has to be some division of labor at some point for things to run smoothly.” The couple say they bring complementary strengths to their joint ministry. Nicholas said pastoral care and counseling are his wife’s strengths. “There was a time when I once thought I was the stronger preacher. Now it’s probably a tossup,” he said. Freyer said her husband is strongest as a worship leader and planner, “and I think his extraordinary gift is in teaching.” The two say they try to show the congregation what it means to live and work in partnership.

“This is a rough job,” Freyer said. “You’re with them (the church members) at every important crux of their lives. You need to have someone who understands how exhausted you are at the end of the day. We always wanted a partner who was our equal and our best friend.” Professionally, Freyer said, she must contend with the image of being a pastor’s wife. “I’m probably seen less as an equal colleague by people at large,” she said. But, she said, time will tell otherwise.

Archival Note: This article has been dynamically reconstructed from the original public record print archives of the Patriot Ledger